The Question that is Changing My Life

I’ve been sharing with you my experiences as I undertake some coaching and although it’s been a few days since I spoke with my coach, this one thing that happened during my most recent session (a week ago) is something that I’ve already found myself implementing almost daily and it’s had such a positive impact that I just need to share my experience with it.

As we were having a discussion… about topics that somehow managed to get puked up from the vast abyss that is my soul… two topics: Confidence, and Anger came to the surface.

Feeling quite embarrassed from the thoughts that whirl through my mind at any given time, I wasn’t entirely sure how any good was going to come from talking about these topics.

Like hello world! This is me… lacking in my once revered confidence and feeling angry at absolutely nothing, yet everything, all the time. Surely you want to be near me knowing all of this! Right?

No. I doubt it.

I was feeling like an impostor. I expected that by saying all of these thoughts out loud that my coach would be horrified and realise I wasn’t as good a person as she gave me credit for.

For the record, she didn’t. Quite the opposite. And once we were done discussing a few points about the why’s and where’s she asked me this life changing question.


“What is that costing you?”

It is absolutely the best question I have been asked in my lifetime. As I paused to contemplate before I gave my answer, in that moment I knew my perspective and ability to self reflect had forever been changed.

On the days where my depression and anxiety are taking over everything (Because this is my life lately)… I have asked myself as I lay there “What is this costing me?”

When I’m exhausted from all my training as I recover from multiple injuries on a journey to transform my body and increase my strength, and the desire to sleep in instead of waking up to head to training seems to be all I can think about… I ask myself “What is this costing me?”

If I’m stuck in a disagreement or misunderstanding, I’ve taken that moment to ask… “What is this costing me?”

As people ask me to take on tasks, in my mind I proceed through the options and feelings that are evoked and I ask… “What is this costing me?”

And it’s only been a week!

I’m a pretty mindful person when it comes to living but this question has blown my mind.

So simple.

So powerful.

I hope it helps you too.



Read how this opportunity came about here.

Check out my first life coaching experience.


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